Thursday, December 19, 2002

Worshipping others, hating yourself?

A Chinese friend of mine living in San Francisco has long lamented that he's at a significant dating disadvantage, because so many of his female Asian peers insist upon dating White Guys.

This friend has now, thankfully, found a wonderful (and Chinese) girlfriend, but out of curiosity, I checked out some personal listings on the Bay Area Community site Craigs List and -- to my surprise and dismay -- found that this fella has a legitimate gripe.

Again and again, I saw comments like, "I'm asian, and I'm looking for a white guy between 23-30." Some even apologized in advance for their 'preference' but -- unsurprisingly -- no explanations were forthcoming.

Sure, you hear about the occasional blonde girl with the black fetish, but it seems to me that most of this "diverse" love is one-way... minorities seeking white men and women.

Is this a form of self-hate? And how much of this is caused or exacerbated by media images?

According to Malaysian officials, who recently rejected an advertisement featuring the very white Brad Pitt, the media plays a role in "humiliation against Asians."

Is this a case of chicken and egg? Is the media (over)representation of whites a symptom or a cause of much of the attraction minorities profess for non-minorities?

And either way, who -- if anyone -- should have a hand in 'correcting' these biases? The media? Governments? Independent advocacy groups?

As with so many complex issues, it seems there are no simple solutions.
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